Being 28 now I feel like I have grown so much as a person over the last 5/6 years and I am blessed to have been awakened at such a young age.
I decided to write a blog post of things I would say to my younger self so that hopefully other people can learn from them.
- Look for the positive as much as possible in every situation: As a Teenager I struggled a lot through life and I had no idea that changing my thoughts and my energy could have changed my circumstances. I used to believe everything happened to me, not for me. I felt like everyone and everything was against me and I was always a pessimist and a negative thinker. Since learning how to change my thoughts into positive ones and to stay hopeful when things are going wrong, I have not only managed to change who I am but I have changed my life in general. Don’t get me wrong, I still have bad days and times but the majority of the time I’m good!
- Cut all of the toxic people out of your life: I wish I would have learned this at a much earlier age! I used to always want to be liked so I would do so much for people who were really just using me! A lot of people would be nice to my face and slag me off behind my back and people used to take advantage of me ALL the time! I have toughened up big time since I was younger and I have cut off a hell of a lot of people, it doesn’t mean I ‘hate’ them it just means they’re not for me and if they’re not happy for me or adding to my life then I don’t want them around me.
- Leave people to do the dumb shit they do: I’ve had people spread lies and rumours about me, bitch about me and try to ruin my businesses. The positive was they actually gained me more business instead and I learned who was for me and who wasn’t. There comes a time when you have to realise that some people are just idiots and you have to leave them to do the dumb shit that they do, true colours always show in the end, karma isn’t far away and they’re clearly not happy with their own life to be so bothered about yours. Don’t react, don’t respond, just know that their karma is coming and in return you will receive more blessings.
- It is okay not to be liked: Some people will not like you and that’s okay! We are all brought up differently, we are all different people and we all have different likes, dislikes and beliefs. This took a while for me to accept as I used to always want to be liked, now I don’t really give a shit as much. I am who I am and to be honest I usually don’t like them in return anyway lol!
- Don’t let fear hold you back: I have a lot of fears! Ha ha. I used to suffer really badly with anxiety but one thing I have never done is avoid the things I’m afraid of. This year especially I have pushed myself to do things that make me anxious or fearful because I believe leaving our comfort zone is where we grow. I can be anxious as hell and regret agreeing to do something beforehand, but afterwards I am so glad I did it and I know that it means I wont look back to regrets.
- Don’t feel like you have to explain yourself: The people who truly know you will know the things you would and wouldn’t do so don’t feel like you have to explain yourself to anybody. I used to always feel like if someone said something bad about me I had to explain and defend myself, whereas now I am learning to just let it go because the people who do know me will know the truth.
- Don’t listen to others opinions: The only opinion that really matters in anything is your own, it is your life so deep down you know what you want and how you feel. Everyone you ask will have a different opinion to you anyway, so just follow your heart and your beliefs and don’t be swayed by someone else’s opinion.
- Everyone will doubt you until you prove them wrong: This happened to me when I started my businesses, I didn’t have many people believe in me or support me. Most people just saw it as a hobby and didn’t think it would go anywhere but of course I proved people wrong, muahahaha! Most people don’t believe in something until they see it, so don’t be surprised if other people doubt you and try to put you off doing something, it is up to you to prove them wrong. Are you really going to stop yourself doing something because someone says it cant be done? Don’t be an idiot!
- See through the hate: I have learned to stop seeing hate as a personal attack towards me and instead I look at what is really going on. People strike out when they’re unhappy or in pain, maybe they see you as someone they want to be, or they see something you have as something they want and in some cases they just want to hurt others! Happy people don’t hate on others and they don’t treat people like shit, so if you have someone behaving this way towards you, just understand that they’re in a bad place and don’t take it personally. The person without a smile is the person who needs one of yours.
- Forgive yourself, forgive others and apologise when you should: We all do stupid things, or say stupid things at some point in life. It is important to forgive people for the mistakes they have made and this doesn’t mean that what they did was okay, it just means that you lose the anger/resentment/pain that you’re holding inside. You must also realise and forgive yourself for the mistakes you have made in life, we are all growing and changing and you are not the same person you were back then. The hardest thing to do is to apologise for mistakes but doing so releases any guilt you’re holding on to, makes you feel better and allows you to accept that you have done everything you could to put things right. I never used to apologise when I was younger and when I had depression I was an absolute bitch! So recently I sent Facebook messages to everyone I’ve ever pissed off or been a bitch to (even if I didn’t know what I did wrong) and I apologised and explained what I was going through. Only one person replied and most of them probably thought I was mental haha but it made me feel better, released any negativity I was holding on to and it felt like something I had to do.
- Drama, be gone: Thankfully I don’t really come across drama anymore but if I do notice a drama starting up I make sure I stay out of it, its just not worth my time, energy or emotion. Life is so short and you don’t know how long you’re here for so there isn’t much point wasting life on drama, hate, jealousy, bitterness or negativity.
- There is no competition: So many people compete in life and in business and its really not necessary! There is more than enough of everything to go around so if you spend your time and energy focusing on others then you’re not going to succeed. Your time and energy should be spent on improving yourself and doing what you love, not worrying about what Joan up the road is doing this week. When you become the best that YOU can be you will start to attract the things that you want.
- Always stand up for yourself: If someone is being an arsehole and treating you like shit then stand up for yourself! Believe it or not I didn’t have a voice when I was younger and used to allow people to treat me like shit. Anyone who knows me now will be surprised because I don’t take shit anymore. Standing up for yourself is the only way to prevent people walking over you and taking you for a ride so I believe it really is necessary in a lot of situations.
- Don’t believe the social media BS: In today’s society everyone seems to post the most ridiculous bullshit on the internet. Don’t believe all the statuses about perfect relationships, tons of money and holidays and material things, the people who feel to brag about these things are almost always the ones who don’t have it! So many people do this and really they’re unhappy in their relationship, they have credit cards or things on finance or are in debt trying to keep up with the Joneses. It’s rather pathetic actually. Anyone can write something online! I could write I ride unicorns for a living and shit glitter and some idiot would believe it, ha ha!
- Be yourself and own it: I’m scatty, I used to suffer badly with anxiety, (and still do some times) I have a sick phobia, I’m sarcastic and I have Vitiligo. Pretty much everyone in person and online knows this because I’m very open about it, its who I am so why would I pretend it wasn’t? I used to feel like I had to hide my Vitiligo and anxiety from people because they would think I was a freak or wouldn’t accept me and this actually made me more anxious because I felt really under pressure. I tell most people about all of the above now because I accepted myself a long time ago so it really doesn’t bother me anymore, I also don’t feel under pressure or anxious when meeting people now because I don’t have to hide who I am. When you accept yourself other people will too.
- It is okay not to be a sheep: I openly admit I am not like most people. I don’t do things just because others are doing it, especially if I don’t agree with it. I do my own research on things and I don’t take one person’s word for it. I follow alternative health and believe herbs, diet and mindfulness can cure most of our health problems. I don’t believe what the media tells us or what the government tells us. I honestly don’t care what anyone else thinks of my beliefs and you shouldn’t either. If something does feel right to you then don’t do it or believe it. Simples.